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About Deviant Anastasia PFemale/United States Group :iconloveisequal: LoveIsEqual
Love is Equal
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Deviant for 8 Years
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The Differences Between Me by Yaoiforever358 The Differences Between Me :iconyaoiforever358:Yaoiforever358 0 1 Why Hello There. by Yaoiforever358 Why Hello There. :iconyaoiforever358:Yaoiforever358 14 26
Its True....
Its true.
No matter how many time you lay awake at night staring at your ceiling, no matter how many times you flirt with a girl or get awkward and nervous around her,
No matter how many times you tell yourself,
And you probably never will be. She was your first love, she was the one you were going to marry. She was such an integral part of your life for 8 months, that of course you still think of her.
You want to hate her.
I mean she cheated on you right?
You want to be upset, to not like her, to just erase all thoughts of her from your head.
But you can't can you?
Even now, months after she broke up with you, admitted she cheated on you, after you even told yourself that you had moved on, you still think of her. She still peaks in your head, and your biggest fear (after Zombies), no matter how irrational it is, is that shes going to show up at school no matter how unlikely.
Its hard getting over her, isn't it?
A small part of your heart still wants her, still ye
:iconyaoiforever358:Yaoiforever358 4 4
Now, maybe it's the pain pills talking,
I mean I never have been good with words,
But this whole situation just confuses me.
Well and truly it does.
See, I happened to meet someone.
Completely by accident mind you.
I was playing my Ukuelele, Dru,
And she was…well, waiting.
She asked me to play for her,
So I played for her.
Plain and simple.
Who would have known it could lead to this?
She and I are opposites.
She's done some major things, She's lived her life.
Me? I haven't done much.
I just sit home and just nerd out.
She's fire,
I'm air.
She's not afraid to speak her mind and be her,
I was living a lie for so long.
That is certainly not to say we are dating or anything!
I just got out of a relationship, don't need a new one.
And she is, well shes still in one.
That's not even why this situation is confusing me so.
You see, I don't want to bore her.
I don't want her to think I am nothing but some lame kid,
Someone who doesn't know anything.
She has done things I could on
:iconyaoiforever358:Yaoiforever358 1 2
Love Knows No Gender by Yaoiforever358 Love Knows No Gender :iconyaoiforever358:Yaoiforever358 3 0
Mature content
Prayer for Forgiveness :iconyaoiforever358:Yaoiforever358 1 12
Reaching Out To You
As I stand in that dank, dark alleyway.
My mind immediately flashes through my life.
My childhood,
My middle school years,
And meeting you in High school all flash through my mind.
Staring down the barrel of my mugger's gun,
I don't feel fear,
I've had a good life.
As the gun shots sound,
Echoing like some lone symphony around me,
I can feel my lifeblood start to seep out.
As I lay in that dank, dark alleyway,
I reach my hands out to the sky above.
Reaching for you and hoping you're there to welcome me.
:iconyaoiforever358:Yaoiforever358 1 4
Walking into the room I see something.
It's a mirror,
Standing all alone amongst the dust,
Its surface shines like a new coin.
Walking closer I see myself follow.
Only its not me.
Not really.
She looks and talks like me, but she isn't.
Staring into that lone mirror,
I see my life start to flash like an old movie.
Running, playing, moving, growing.
All the major events flash before my eyes.
In each of the scenes though,
There is one constant.
While everything else is in vibrant color,
I'm simply stuck in shades of gray.
I see myself laughing and smiling,
I look so happy and like a regular child.
But I know the truth.
I didn't feel like I belonged.
I don't know what really lead to it,
But I began to hide who I was.
Instead of embracing me,
I hid her away to become what others wanted.
I began to doubt who I really was.
To busy worrying how to portray myself
People made fun of me for many things.
I became a sheep to try and please them.
The girl in the mirror starts to slump,
Almost as if
:iconyaoiforever358:Yaoiforever358 3 6
Walking through these halls,
I can't help but feel more alone.
Around my heart I've built up walls
To protect myself else I'll groan.
I'm not the only one hiding behind a mask.
I see others who laugh and smile
Loathe to leave their true selves to bask
They hide like me on their lone isle.
Surrounded by people yet still friendless
They are all smiles and jokes,
Their cries sound beneath the surface,
But if they ever try to speak they choke.
Can you be the one to see beneath the façade?
Will you be able to see the truth?
Or like everyone else fall for the charade.
To afraid to see the truth.
The answers lie in the eyes.
Not just with me but for others as well.
We speak the "truth" which is all lies.
Our true selves hidden beneath a shell.
:iconyaoiforever358:Yaoiforever358 4 10
Why am I here?
The wind is blowing softly through the trees,
The cool night air refreshing me as I sit under the tree to stare at the stars.
There are so many of them.
They light up the sky with their brilliance.
The moons lights up the sky as well,
So full,
So bright,
Softly, as I sigh I just ponder why I'm here.
Why am I alive?
What is my purpose?
I close my eyes to try and think,
And as I do it begins.
Slowly, almost as if like an old movie scenes flash before my eyes.
My first best friend,
Playing kickball in grade school,
Moving across the country and leaving behind the only family I've ever known.
Arriving in my new state and meeting the family I didn't know I had.
Watching them all interact,
While I'm stuck on the outside not knowing what to do.
Then, suddenly the scenes begin to speed up.
My first big southern storm flashes as brightly as the lightening did that day.
Moving an hour away from my new family.
Starting school late and feeling all alone.
Meeting my new friends,
Learning about the
:iconyaoiforever358:Yaoiforever358 9 2
Sven Bellator
He has shaggy brown hair with the ends of it hanging a bit below his shoulder blades. It can get in his way a lot so he usually ties it up in a low ponytail. He has a small goatee. On his right cheek he has three traingle tattoos within each other, His eye color is gold with slits. He has a small fang poking from his upper lip. Usually, like Aza, he wears a cloak, though his is black as night. Also like Aza he foroges shoes, and instead allows his clawed feet to be seen. He doesn't wear a shirt a lot so you have a clear view of the claw scars on his chest. He hates wearing shirts since they constrict his movements to much. He DOES wear pants, though they are often baggy with many pockets. On his back is a big broadsword with a red handle. He doesn't wear jewelry, though he does have a simple necklace with a wolf's tooth on it. On his shoulders are tattoos in the shape of a chain of skulls and the other a ring of darkness. HIs body is built lit
:iconyaoiforever358:Yaoiforever358 1 6
My Ancestor's Song
The morning sun is rising.
Racing across the rolling hills
And across the lush forest
Its rays bring light and life into it.
The breeze wafting through the forest was all that broke the silence.
Soon the gentle sounnd of bird song start to sound.
Animals of all sizes were waking up
The woods were alive once again
Standing atop a lone hill,
I let the soft rays of the new sun warm me.
The breeze wafts through my hair,
And with it the smell of the forest invades my senses.
Softly the notes of a flute sound in my head,
The notes slow and sensual,
Their message calling to the blood that flows in my veins
They are speaking to my very core
Soon the beats of a drum start to accompany them,
Their tempo matching my heart beat for beat.
Voices rise from nowhere,
Their lyrics my mind doesnt understand but my soul knows so well.
It is call of the hills
The voices of the forests below.
I can feel the urge start to well up.
I MUST do something.
The song of my ancestors pick up pace,
And thus my body
:iconyaoiforever358:Yaoiforever358 2 3
What did I do wrong?
What did I do wrong?
Please tell me so I can fix whatever it is that I did!
I'm sorry for whatever I did wrong just don't leave me!
I'm sorry that I can't be there for you right now!
I would if I could but I can't.
I'd drop all that I have here and go over there to you.
Please stop hurting me...
It hurts....
I don't want to believe them....
But in my heart I know its true...
Make the pain go away like you did in the beginning...
Make it stop....
So its really over huh....
You're just going to throw away all of it?
Act like it never happened,
And throw it all away?
It was for TEN MONTHS!!!
Don't do this....
You called me a cheater?
I stayed faithful to you for TEN MONTHS,
TEN MONTHS while you lived in a different COUNTRY.
I NEVER thought of cheating on you.
You said I never tried to contact you?
I emailed you constantly.
I let Lexi tell you everything I said.
I didn't tell her things she wasn't allowed to say
I'd have called you if you had a phone!
I t
:iconyaoiforever358:Yaoiforever358 13 13
It Gets Better.
Hi there. Usually when I write something, its because of some deeper reason or something. But this time, I'm writing so I can just try and confess some things. I don't know if I want the people close to me to read this, mainly because if they did they'd probably think I was lying or that I was in trouble. But I'm fine. For this one, I just want to write this because I feel the need to confess some things. Well for one thing, I'm a fifteen year-old junior living in North Carolina, and I've tried to commit suicide multiple times. That's sorta melodramatic, but it's the truth. When I was in 3rd grade, I'd try and suffocate myself by hanging myself or tying a scarf around my neck. I just….I always knew I was different from the other people. I didn't think the boys were cute, or that they were all that great. I'd rather spend time with the girls. But even back then….I knew being who I was, was wrong. So I kept it in. I lied to myself for years. But the pain and emptiness was still
:iconyaoiforever358:Yaoiforever358 12 12
Hexra's Story Chapter 2
The next morning arrived much the same as the one before. A calm, gentle breeze was wafting through the trees, bringing with it the sound of distant voices and the calls of wild animals. The one glaring differences from yesterday morning was the smell of breakfast being cooked over an open fire.
Having been treated worse than the lowest criminal for most of her life, Hexra had to develop and fine tune her senses to the point of being beyond humanly possible. Her usually morning routine would have been her waking up to the comforting meows and mews of Boo then trying to find some food in the nearby trashcans or maybe being able to steal
something from a vendor.
But not this morning.
No this morning all poor Hexra wanted to do was just try to sleep away all her problems, just slip away in to the comforting darkness.
"I know you're awake."
The same female voice spoke somewhere near her left. While the voice was distinctly female, it also had a slightly rougher edge, as if it was not accus
:iconyaoiforever358:Yaoiforever358 0 6
Mature content
Hexra's story :iconyaoiforever358:Yaoiforever358 0 3


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Anastasia P
United States
Well I'm a girl who lives in North Carolina.

I'm a lesbian. And I've learned to be proud of who I love and who I am. If people cant accept me for me, then I shouldn't care who they are or they're opinions.

I'm half Filipino and Half Lumbee(Native American). I can act like a fool and dork, but I am also a thinker, a philosopher, and I'm not afraid to challenge the norm.

I don't exactly agree with the government, or any politics since I think its a bunch of BS. What do I want to do after highschool?

Live Life to the fullest and go after my dreams.

Current Residence: In my happy place
Favourite genre of music: Alternative, Rock, Metal, basically anything besides bluegrass and SOME country.
Favourite photographer: Those National Geographic people
Favourite style of art: Alternative and contemporary
Operating System: Laptop?
MP3 player of choice: iPod Touch
Shell of choice: Sand DOLLAR
Wallpaper of choice: Any paper that will stick to said wall
Skin of choice: ....Dark Blue?
Favourite cartoon character: Toushiro Hitsugaya is MINE!!!
Personal Quote: If I dropped my mask but not my insecurities, would you stand by me?
  • Listening to: William Fitzsimmons - I Don't Feel It Anymore
  • Reading: Red Swan fanfics
  • Watching: YouChube
  • Playing: Online video games
  • Eating: Air
  • Drinking: Tea
I made this account WAAAAAAY back in the day when I was still a "ZOMG LOOK AT ALL DAT PWETTY YAOI!!!11111!!!! LOLZ IMA FANGIRLZ ALL OVA IT TO HIDE HOW GAY I AM LULZ." So yeah, I made this account in middle school. And I've always SUCKED at coming up with names.
Seriously you should see my Aol and Myspace name...
But anyways, I found out that you can change your frigging dA name?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!



You need a premium account....and unfortunately, I am flat broke. I mean I have PAPER money. Not digimoney though.

Ya know my asian dads all paranoid the government is gonna track him or someones gonna steal his card number -_-

So I am stuck with this stupid name....

Everytime I see it...I cringe.

Nothing against the people who like or commit this, Its just not my cup of tea anymore.....


I want a premium account JUST to change my stupid name...............



Add a Comment:
Whisperwings Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks so much for adding 'Ravenclaw Tower' to your favorites!! :icongwompplz:
SkeleVee Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2012  Student Digital Artist
Aza..... What's up with the user named HumbleArtist123? .....Are they harassing you? Is that why you have your status set to invisible on dA?
Yaoiforever358 Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2012
Chill sis....its fine. If you really want to know what the whole ish is so far, just try texting me.
DakotaTheZombie Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2011  Student General Artist
Thank you for the fave. (:
Yaoiforever358 Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2011
No problem! Not many can do it, but you REALLY can pull off that blue hair.
HumbleArtist123 Featured By Owner Oct 17, 2011  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
You bastard. How dare you make fun of me in school!
Junkie4Janet Featured By Owner Oct 6, 2011
Thanks for the fave! :D
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